Of Secrets and Admittance
by DementedViper
Summary: Sequal to 'Of Hidden Truths and Curiosity' ArthurMerlin slash. Arthur finds out about Merlin's past and sees his future. Warnings: slight mention of abuse and slash


**Disclaimer: I unfortuantly dont own merlin or Arthur or even lancelot. i just own the twisted little plot**

**i have reread this but some things make sence to me and not others**

**it would be a good idea to read 'Of Hidden Truths and Curiosity' But its not nessacry.**

**enjoy**

* * *

Arthur looked up at the tentive knock on his door. "Enter" he called the door opened and Merlin came in and eyed him cautiously "You're late"

"I wasn't sure if you wanted me around after my _revelation_ yesterday" He said watching for a reaction.

"Come on Merlin you only told me you were into men" he rolled his eyes "as long as you don't peek when I dress I see no reason"

"Other then it's unnatural and against the law?"

"And so is magic" the young prince smirked "I'm not going to tell Merlin…where else would I find another man-servant as loyal as you?"

"You're getting sappy in you old age" Merlin smirked

"I'm getting old am I?" he smirked back and Merlin hummed nodding

"Just because I am older then you oh great wizard-ing one…doesn't mean I am getting old"

"But you're getting sappy?" Arthur growled and dove for him pushing him to the floor making Merlin laugh and try and fight against him

"What was that little one?" he snarled teasingly down at Merlin who blinked the smile slowly falling off his face and he laughed "oh come on Merlin I'm not going to hurt you"

"Can you get off me?" Arthur frowned but got off his friend and helped him up

"Sorry?" he tried but Merlin shrugged not looking at him. "Merlin is something wrong?"

"No. Fine. What do you need me to do today?"

"Why don't you just polish my armour and then you can go" he nodded and set to work ignoring Arthur watching him curiously. The blond prince frowned trying to work out why Merlin was suddenly closed off. Was it something he said? Sighing he went and washed and when he came back Merlin was gone. After dressing he went to Gaius.

"Gaius?"

"Come in young prince" he smiled waving him in. "What can I do for you today?"

"Is Merlin here?"

"He went to your chambers…if he's skivi…"

"Don't worry I was just wondering if he came back here he's finished his work for the day…Gaius…did something happen to Merlin? I mean before he came here?"

"Why?" he asked cautiously

"Because we were playing about and I pinned him to the floor and said something then he became tense and wouldn't look at me"

"What did you say?"

"I called him little one?" Gaius winced and tried to hid it "Gaius I didn't mean to hurt him I just want to know what's wrong? I'm not going to tell my father about his secrets he should know that"

"Secrets?"

"Yes his gift and preference" the man looked shocked but nodded

"No he didn't come back here…you may have brought back some memories…that is all I can say as it really isn't my place"

"Any idea where I could find him?"

"Maybe somewhere high up and secluded a tree or something?" Arthur nodded and waved as he quickly left. It didn't take long for him to find his man servant and he easily climbed the tree and perched next to him.

"Merlin?" he tensed and Arthur bit his lip but slid his arm around his shoulders "What did I do to hurt you Merlin?"

"Not you" he sniffed and Arthur pulled him to his chest letting him curl up

"I'm not going to hurt you Merlin"

"I know…I needed to think"

"About?" Merlin tensed again "Merlin?"

"A number of things?"

"Like?"

"Jumping maybe" he looked down to the forest floor and Arthur felt a shiver go through him

"Tell me what happened?"

"Not here" he said quietly Arthur nodded and they climbed down. He led Merlin back to his rooms and settled his friend on his bed then sat beside him letting him put his head in his lap. Arthur hoped no one came in because it wouldn't do for them to see him with his manservant laying on him. Arthur tentivaly played with Merlin's hair like Morgana did when he had gone to her after a nightmare. "When my old village found out about my preference they said I was a devil child swapped at birth…they tried to cleanse me with rituals and I was tired to a cross…and then it didn't work…and they…"

"What did they do Merlin?"

"They let me go and it was really weird I didn't know why. Then I was pulled into a dark house on my way home…there were men and a few women they were laughing and leering and…" he shuddered

"Shh it's ok" Arthur soothed him he could guess what happened even if he didn't want to. He slid down the bed and pulled Merlin close to him "I'm sorry" Merlin shrugged burying his face in his neck. Arthur frowned as he felt something wet on his neck "Merlin don't cry" he sighed stroking the younger mans hair

"Sorry"

"Shh" he let Merlin cry and rubbed his back as he did so. The door was pushed open and Morgana came in and blinked at him he put a finger to his lips and she nodded leaving quietly. When Merlin had fallen asleep he tucked him up and watched him for a while before leaving and finding Morgana.

"Is Merlin ok?" She asked seeing him and putting her book down.

"I don't know" he shrugged she held out her hand and he walked over taking it and sitting beside her. "I miss the years I could get away with laying with you" she chuckled

"What's wrong with him?"

"Just his past and me being a stupid ignorant twit"

"He told you he likes men?"

"How do you know?"

"It was obvious"

"I thought he liked Gwen" Morgana rolled her eyes

"He likes you Arthur"

"Oh" she smiled and patted his head "Are you sure?" she chuckled and kissed his temple

"You are so oblivious it's cute"

"Morgana"

"I know" she rolled her eyes. Gwen came in and curtsied at Arthur.

"There's screaming coming from your room prince Arthur" Arthur blinked then was a blue as he rushed out of the room Gwen looked at Morgana who smiled at her.

"Merlin"

"What's he doing in Arthur's room?"

"Having a nightmare I guess" Gwen frowned and Morgana shrugged "Lets go for a walk Gwen"

…

Arthur cuddled Merlin to him as he fought against the nightmare. Brown eyes shot open and Arthur hushed him

"It's just me Merlin…I'm not going to hurt you"

"Arthur?"

"Yes it's me. You're safe"

"I…fell asleep?"

"Yes…you looked tired"

"Didn't sleep well last night" Arthur nodded he had thought as much.

"Hey you said you can't dance?"

"Never had a need to dance"

"Well you do now" he smiled standing up and pulled Merlin up as well.

"Arthur what…"

Arthur laughed and started teaching him the simple steps to the dances. After an hour or so they stopped and Arthur realised that he had been leading Merlin and the smaller man was tucked up in his arms. Trying hard not to let his face heat up Arthur pulled back and Merlin blinked up slowly recognising where they were and flushed.

"I um…should go…" Arthur sat him on the bed and walked to the door sticking his head out and saying something to the guards. He came back to Merlin and sat watching him "What?"

"Nothing" he smiled Merlin sighed and laid his head on Arthur's shoulder. Arthur looked down at him and played with his hair.

"Ok who are you and what have you done with Arthur?"

"Ha-ha" he rolled his eyes and Merlin looked up at him. Arthur looked down at the movement and gently brushed his lips against his

"Arthur…"

"Shh…I've never done this before but…" It felt so right, he thought brushing his lips across Merlin's again and the young wizard licked his lips and laid back making Arthur follow half laying on top of him and he tentivaly kissed his friend and soon the kisses go harder and more passionate until Merlin groaned as Arthur's tongue slid in and caressed the creases it could get to whilst being tentive. When they needed air Arthur pulled back and smiled down at him. Tracing his face with his fingers Arthur smiled as Merlin lent into his touch.

"So this means…"

"You're mine…if you want to be" Merlin nodded and curled into Arthur's warmth making him chuckle and hold him "and I think I'm yours"

"What about Morgana?"

"She's more my sister then anything" he smiled and nipped at Merlin's neck making him snigger Arthur looked at him and stroked his cheek again "You know I'll try my hardest not to hurt you?"

"I know…you're being sappy again"

"I'm a prince I can be sappy if I want to"

"Even if we're against the law?"

"Shh" their was a knock on the door and Merlin jumped up as the door opened and a servant brought in two plates of food she skilfully curtsied at Arthur who waved to his dressing table and she put the plates down then left.

"Dinner?" Arthur asked as he stood and pressed himself against Merlin's back wrapping his arms around his waist

"What…I mean…"

"Yes" he laughed pushing him forward and sitting him down then sitting beside him they ate and Arthur just smirked at Merlin's curious looks.

"Arthur…why?"

"Because I think you may be the person I want to have at my side all my life"

"You will as your servant"

"No as my…lover" Merlin nodded and accepted the soft kiss

"I don't…I've never…got further then kissing"

"It's ok we'll go through it together work it out as we go…I've never liked a man like this" he pushed the plates away and stood up pulling Merlin up "But we have to keep up appearances"

"I know"

"Good now come on" he led him out and they went to Gaius' rooms. The man looked at them as they entered and smiled looking away "Gaius I shall be stealing Merlin for the night. Merlin go collect what ever you shall need for tomorrow and tonight" Merlin gave him a confused look but did as told.

"Don't hurt him"

"How did you know?"

"He looks baffled but happy and you stand closer together and you have a smug look"

"I'm the prince"

"Who's discovering deeper feelings for his servant and friend" he smiled.

"He's vulnerable in a way that makes him appealing"

"If you say so" Merlin came back with a bag over his shoulder

"Have a good night boys…and behave" Merlin flushed making Arthur coo and laugh pulling him closer to him

"We will" Arthur said steering Merlin out

"Night" Merlin mumbled following Arthur

Arthur woke up feeling slightly cold and opened his eyes to see Merlin with his head inst his chest flipping through a book. His shoulder was cold.

"Hey…why aren't you asleep?"

"Bad dream"

"Why didn't you wake me?"

"I'm fine." Arthur made him look up and saw he had red puffy eyes "You looked peaceful" he shrugged Arthur sighed and slid down and kissed Merlin

"What are you reading?"

"Magic book" Arthur hummed and kissed him again "Arthur…too fast"

"Sorry" he put the book under the bed and pulled him into his arms letting Merlin snuggle up "Wake me up next time" Merlin nodded and Arthur waited for him to fall asleep before drifting off as well.

**Please feel free to reveiw they make me happy...but i dont demand them**


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